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I Am Not Enough

The majority of my fear and anxiety comes from the root of where I place my worth. It manifests in feeling like I can’t measure up to unspoken expectations of the people around me, myself, and ultimately, God (but goodness knows, I’m going to try).

I’m cheered on in this mentality by songs that tell me that God says I am brave and strong, and by shiny internet quotes shouting "you are enough", and by my own selfish heart that fights to be on the throne. Those words fuel me in my attempts to work to be seen, they help me to build my mask. I don't feel like I'm "brave, strong, or enough" today, but I certainly have to look like it, or everyone will know I'm a fraud. 

I know myself better than that. I am not brave, I am not strong, and I will spend my whole life exhausting every effort I have to be "enough" until I stop looking around this world for validation and look to my Creator. I must look to His words, the only words that satisfy, because He knows me, He remembers that I am only dust (Psalm 103:14). Scripture never says that I am brave, it tells me to be courageous because the Lord is with me. Scripture never tells me that I am strong, it says to be strong in the Lord. Scripture never tells me that I am enough, it tells me that Christ is enough. It tells me:

God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God.

And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification and redemption, so that, as it is written, ‘Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.’” 1 Corinthians 1:27-31

I don’t need to meet any expectations today, but to be foolish, weak, and low, and by His grace turn to Christ to let my boasting be in Him alone. That, I can do.

The Consider the Wildflowers Kit is designed as a reminder to trust the Lord in the midst of anxiety, fear, and worry, knowing that once we have given those to Him in prayer, He has promised to fill us with His peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:6-7). Pray over every fear, every effort you're laying at His feet today. Write down the worries you carry and close them in the box. As the temptation to fear arises, see the box in your home as a reminder that you’ve already given them to the Lord. Consider how the wildflowers grow and how He cares for them (Luke 12:27). In time, open the box to reflect on His faithfulness.

He always has been, He always will be. (Even when you're not).